You know that old trees just grow stronger. Old rivers grow wilder every day. But old people just grow lonely, waiting for someone to say, "Hello in There". (Hello in There-John Prine)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RfwGkplB_sY
(Listen ya'll!)
Recently I read a Facebook post about cool volunteer opportunities oversees that got me thinking:
What if it were COOL to volunteer to spend time with old people? (I know! Right?!? :) )
A darling lady named Eileen comes to visit Mom for two hours every Wednesday afternoon. She is a volunteer with hospice, a retired hospice nurse who has traveled the World (Just like my mother once did) I loved hearing Eileen say one time, "when I played mahjong in Hong Kong...". Sometimes she brings library books, usually gorgeous illustrated ones that they both oooh and ahhh over. Mom has a hard time talking since her aphasia symptoms make conversation slow and difficult but she is still the queen at cards. Always they play rummy. Always. They chat some before and after the games. Mom doesn't always feel up to company but she is always up for cards. Eileen is cool!
Then there is our Mary. Mary is a paid caregiver who stays with Mom once a month so I can go home for a few days. She also comes to visit sometimes after she finishes her shift with a hospice patient she cares for Monday through Friday from 10 to 2. Mom adores Mary. Mary gives Mom plenty of time to call up her words and prompts her like a sister or best friend would so I often find them chattering away without obvious struggles on Mom's part. And laughing. Mary does not play cards but she gets Mom. Mom gets Mary. Mary is super-sweet and cool!
Mom appreciates these ladies. For one thing they are not me! Most everyone needs a variety of social encounters with other people on a regular basis. Unfortunately, even social butterflies like my mother find their circle has dwindled and these opportunities are more rare as they get older. Mom finds it nearly impossible to leave the house anymore and her peers that are still living are struggling in the same way.
What are the skills needed to volunteer with older folks?
Kindness, empathy, interest.
Is there special training required?
No. Life skills are sufficient. Patience and the ability to laugh and smile are a plus.
What about time commitment?
Now here is the thing. You can never give enough. They will always want more. Give the time you want to and do it in a way that suits you. You do not need to be tied down or imposed upon. Just identify your limits and find your oldie. Let them know what you are available for and be ready to reinforce that!
Where do I sign up? Since it is not yet cool to volunteer to visit oldies I have only found a handful of formal organizations that organize these opportunities. But you can check among your neighbors. Parents of friends. Family people. Check in at a church office-they are likely to have a list of older folks who could use a friend! Let's get this thing trending ya'll! Say HELLO IN THERE!
